Am I Worthy of Life?
I deserve to die.
"for the wages of sin is death..."
--- Romans 6:23
So why am I alive? Am I worthy of life? Will I ever do anything to please God, to prove that I do deserve even a fraction of what He's blessed me with? The answers to those questions are in the same verse.
"...but the free gift of God is eternal life through Christ Jesus our Lord."
--- Romans 6:23
That's right; FREE GIFT. So what does this mean? To me, it means three things.
1. The gift of life is free. It requires no payment, no exchange, no sacrifice. It is free.
2. The only way to receive this gift is through Jesus. Everyone living and dead has been given the gift of mortal life. However, God offers us eternal life, paid fully for by Jesus Christ (which is millions of times better).
3. We don't get to choose what others decide to do for us. It is finished; Jesus died for us. We can't tell Him not to, we can't ignore that He did, we can't tell Him that He made a mistake.
I often have trouble grasping that last part. I know that He was thinking of me as He died; but I don't think He was thinking of my best, most glorious moment. He didn't die for the best of me. He died thinking of me in my sin, in my shame, in my lowest moment- He died for the worst of me, so that through Him, I could be the best of me.
I'm not quite sure what motivated me to write this post after two months of silence. I'm not even sure it makes sense- my thoughts are so abstract that articulating them proves to be quite difficult at times. I pray that my words aren't wasted.
Wishing you joy, courage, & hope,
Jadyn
"for the wages of sin is death..."
--- Romans 6:23
So why am I alive? Am I worthy of life? Will I ever do anything to please God, to prove that I do deserve even a fraction of what He's blessed me with? The answers to those questions are in the same verse.
"...but the free gift of God is eternal life through Christ Jesus our Lord."
--- Romans 6:23
That's right; FREE GIFT. So what does this mean? To me, it means three things.
1. The gift of life is free. It requires no payment, no exchange, no sacrifice. It is free.
2. The only way to receive this gift is through Jesus. Everyone living and dead has been given the gift of mortal life. However, God offers us eternal life, paid fully for by Jesus Christ (which is millions of times better).
3. We don't get to choose what others decide to do for us. It is finished; Jesus died for us. We can't tell Him not to, we can't ignore that He did, we can't tell Him that He made a mistake.
I often have trouble grasping that last part. I know that He was thinking of me as He died; but I don't think He was thinking of my best, most glorious moment. He didn't die for the best of me. He died thinking of me in my sin, in my shame, in my lowest moment- He died for the worst of me, so that through Him, I could be the best of me.
I'm not quite sure what motivated me to write this post after two months of silence. I'm not even sure it makes sense- my thoughts are so abstract that articulating them proves to be quite difficult at times. I pray that my words aren't wasted.
Wishing you joy, courage, & hope,
Jadyn
YES. This was actually one of my biggest roadblocks with my relationship with the Lord. I would stress myself out trying to do everything under the sun because I felt that if I could do all these things that were good, then maybe I could "repay" Jesus for His sacrifice. Then I realized that I was basically trying to save myself through works because I didn't feel worthy of His great love and grace.
ReplyDeleteIt's been so freeing to truly discover HOW INSANELY PASSIONATE HE IS ABOUT ME, ABOUT YOU, ABOUT EACH OF HIS CHILDREN INDIVIDUALLY. Not because of what we do, but because He created us to be close, and He craves that closeness. One thing that really helped me put things into perspective was when I thought about from the perspective of a parent and a child (I know this is a really obvious metaphor XD). A parent doesn't love the child because of what they do, they love their child because THAT IS THEIR CHILD. Nothing that the child does can make the parent love them more or less because the parent already loves the child with their whole heart.
One thing that will forever baffle me is the fact that He felt all of my sin to the fullest extent, He felt the weight of it, He felt it all, yet He can still look at me and call me beautiful and precious. That will always amaze me.
Loved the post. LOVE THE SUBJECT. I HONESTLY JUST GET SO EXCITED WHENEVER I READ OR TALK ABOUT HOW VASTLY WE ARE LOVED. AASLKJDLHF.